This just off the wire….
In a stunning move, www.ComicBookSecrets.com has publicly requested that X-men Origins:Wolverine be delayed indefinitely and when released, bypass theatrical showings for a more environment friendly Internet streaming video distribution.
“It’s time for Marvel to show some leadership on the Green front” a spokesman for Comic Book Secrets said.
“In this new era of hope, anti-violence and global reduction in energy, Marvel should lead the way, and their is no better character to lead this charge than Wolverine, he is in a unique position.”
“First, he is a very violent character, and turning away from this violence would be a role model for people, especially children, everywhere. Added to this, his claws would make wonderful tools. We see him using his metal claws as a sort of plow on an organic farm. Talk about swords to plowshares!” the spokesman added.
When asked why Marvel is being singled out, Comic Book Secrets continued, “Marvel is very visible right now. This would be a newsworthy event, and with the shear number of fans eagerly awaiting this movie, they could truly make an impact. They also have some unique characters. Storm for instance. She could water the crops. Iceman could be instrumental in reversing global warming and restoring vast areas of Artic ice.”
“Of course, we hope DC would also join in. A character such as the Flash could carry Wolverine so the amount of plowing of organic farms would be extensive and completed more quickly than fossil fuel burning tractors. This combination could literally make the tractor obsolete overnight.”
ComicBookSecrets.com doesn’t stop at the characters though. They want the entire movie distribution system changed.
“Instead of releasing the movie in theaters, forcing viewers to drive their cars to catch this much anticipated showing, they could stream the movie over the Internet, cutting down on fossil fuel use and the waste of DVD packaging.”
Marvel Entertainment had no comment on this story.
April Fools from Comic Book Secrets!